Gilbert Watch’s Foraging Stick! (Updated)

by John Galt

In Fiscal Year 2009 Congress borrowed 53.5 cents for every dollar spent.
In Fiscal Year 2010 Congress borrowed 48 cents for every dollar spent.
In Fiscal Year 2011 they didn’t bother to pass a budget. They’ve reached the apex of the debt ceiling of over $14 trillion, and now those in Washington swear they’re going to straighten up and fly right this time.

Now, the national debt is over $17 trillion, and Obama can raise the debt without going to Congress.  (This debt will be paid by your children, grand-children, and great-grand-children.  Enjoy those "FREE" lunches being handed out by your local school district. YOU won’t have to pay for them.)

Being mindful of the possible pending collapse of the United States banking system, we are offering an official Gilbert Watch foraging stick!! Too squeamish to use human bones? You will find this sharpened stick useful for rooting around for edible tubors in the desert.

Various models are available, including Regular, Extra Long, and Ergonomically Designed to assist you in your coming hunter-gatherer nomadic lifestyle.

A few words from our satisfied customers:

D.P., Gilbert: “I got the extra long so I don’t have to crawl around on my hands and knees! No more back breaking rooting for me. Now I can forage standing up”!

J. S., Gilbert. “I got mine custom painted with long-wearing flames. Now I can forage like the wind”!

J.T., Gilbert: “I got mine with a lanyard, so I can wear it around my neck. It’s not just a digging stick. It’s jewelry! What a fashion statement”!

Get yours now! Only $29.95. (Price goes up the closer we get to Armageddon.)

Avoid the rush!

Not available in stores.